What was the last wedding you went to? Were you in the wedding?
I attended the wedding two (or three?) years ago of a member of my ex’s family. It was a daytime wedding at a charming, almost-rural little church in Maryland. The straight-backed pews looked, and felt, like something out of 1790. I wasn’t in the wedding, but I was happy to be there as a well-wisher. It just seemed like the ideal setting for that particular wedding.
Anyway, as that suggests, I haven’t been to—or in—many weddings recently. For one thing, I guess, I’m a gay man, and not that many of my peers can legally marry. I have several partnered friends, but not one of those couples has even had a commitment ceremony. Some of those couples would surely have weddings if they could, though.
Another issue is, sigh, my age. About 10 or 12 years ago, I went through a phase during which many of my straight friends were settling down. There were weddings aplenty, and that was ok with me. I’m a sucker for a love story, and a wedding is, of course, the societally approved time to celebrate a love story. Plus, I really, really, really like wedding cake. Sadly, though, all that settling down seems to have, well, settled down. Maybe I should expect a wave of second marriages soon? I sort of hope so. I could go for some cake.
One other thing seems relevant. I’m one of the youngest members of my family; nearly all of my cousins are older—some much older. So when I was a kid, I did some duty as the adorable kid or the awkward teenager in the wedding. I’ve certainly lit my fair share of wedding candles. But, sadly, as an adult, I’m still waiting for my debut as the best man. Keep me in mind, ok?