So, so close, Mr. TiVo

11 11 2006

Remote
My TiVo is smart. Right after I got it, it figured out I was gay, liked sports, would watch anything poker-related, was partial to edgy comedies, and had a soft spot for hour-long dramas. So when there’s room on my hard drive, and there usually is (it holds 205 hours of programming!), it records all sorts of fairly good “suggestions” for me—things like episodes of The Office, travel specials from Logo, every other program broadcast on the Tennis Channel, and reruns of Alias and The West Wing.

Last Friday, though, when I got home, TiVo had taped only two things for me—Torch Song Trilogy and some drag racing from Speed Channel. Wow, where to start with that? First, I’m sure there’s a joke in there somewhere about drag-queen racing, but Speed Channel hasn’t covered that yet. I’m pretty sure I wouldn’t want to watch that, either.

Anyway, if there’s a man out there who likes both Trilogy and drag racing, I haven’t met him yet. Maybe I should. Personally, I’m not a fan of either Trilogy (psst: Please don’t revoke my gay card for admitting that) or drag racing. Neither provides enough, um, drama. I would’ve been much happier with Gods and Monsters and some Formula One racing. TiVo almost got it right, I guess.

I ended up deleting both suggestions.

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